For any Xbox owners out there involved in a serious relationship, the recent release of Halo 2 was a real crunch to the crotch. Hour after hour of creamy satisfying single-player gameplay gives way to endless weeks of online fulfillment. Who has time for a relationship when the next round starts in 8 seconds? Most of us barely have time to take another bite of our sandwich, much less the time required to turn our full attention to our loved ones in order to ask that they make us another.

It's fair to say that Halo 2, while it may be one of the finest of console games, is tearing relationships apart. Bringing it into the home is a lot like bringing a knife to the Bobbit household. Trouble.

But here at GameSpy, we're here to unite, not to tear apart. We're lovers at GameSpy -- not fighters. We want you and your loved ones to be happy. So to cap off our week of enormous Halo 2 coverage, I'm publishing this helpful and informative pamphlet for couples:



Open it up and let's see what's inside.